This is from an e-mail forward I received - haha!
Pregnant Turkey
Last year at Thanksgiving my mom went to my sister's house for
the traditional feast. Knowing how gullible my sister is, my mom decided to play a trick. She told my sister that she needed something from the store.
When my sister left, my mom took the turkey out of the oven, removed
the stuffing, stuffed a Cornish hen, inserted it into the turkey, and re-stuffed the turkey. She then placed the bird(s) back in the oven.
When it was time for dinner, my sister pulled the turkey out of the oven and proceeded to remove the stuffing. When her spoon hit something she reached in and pulled out the little bird.
With a look of total shock on her face, my mother exclaimed, "Patricia,
you've cooked a pregnant bird!"
At the reality of this horrifying news, my sister started to cry.
It took the family two hours to convince her that turkeys lay eggs!
And yes... she's blonde!
Happy Thanksgiving to all!
That's actually sort of disturbing, don't you think? ...Sort of like Turducken.
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
Friday, November 24, 2006
Celebrity Dreamin' on Such a Winter's Day
I have had the weirdest dreams involving celebrities lately... Take for example:
1) I dreamt that I was in line somewhere waiting to get into this building where I think we were going to be competing for something. Whatever it was, we needed to have a partner for the competition. So, standing to my left, who was my partner? None other than Ms. Martha Stewart. Yeah, weird right? As we were standing in the line, however, Martha would NOT SHUT UP. She just kept rambling and rambling as if she was nervous and trying to relax, but no one thought she was amusing. Eventually I looked at her and said, "Martha, will you please shut up???" But it was to no avail. She just kept talking. Finally we had moved up in line to where we were almost about to go into the building. And Martha, says to me, "Oh I'll be right back. I have to go get something out of my car." I was getting annoyed and told her that it was almost our turn, but she just kept walking and saying "I know, it's ok. I'll just be right back. Don't you worry one bit." I then watched as she got in her car, started it, and drove off. Martha abandoned me!! And this is after I wore my Free Martha shirt for so long when she was *ahem* "away" :( oh well, Annie Lennox says, "Sweet dreams are made of these." (Did anyone watch The Apprentice: Martha?? There should be at least 5 people who get that reference).
2) I was in the movie Dreamgirls as....one of the Dream girls??? But I was still a guy, so I guess that makes me the odd one out. Regardless... we were going about our day and on some sort of adventure (haha!) but me and the other girls did NOT like Beyoncé. So we would talk about her behind her back, and then she would come over with her abnormaly large smile and we would start fawning all over her so she wouldn't know we didn't like her... O_o
3) Lastly, this one was just last night.. I was hanging out somewhere - at a restaurant or coffee shop or someplace similar and in walks Karl Lagerfeld with an entourage. The dream could've ended there and it would still be entertaining, but there's more! He walks up to me and a few other people around me and says to each of us, "You. You. You. You. and You." We then get ushered away by his entourage and are taken to a studio where we are informed that Karl needs models for a photoshoot for his new line and he didn't want anyone that had modeled before, therefore he handpicked us to be in his campaign. I don't remember much past that, but I do remember that he was very particular about the shoot and we had to pose and look exactly as he told us to do (he would demonstrate for us how he wanted us to look).
What do these dreams mean...?????? Tell me in the comments section, or share your own wacky celebrity dreams!
1) I dreamt that I was in line somewhere waiting to get into this building where I think we were going to be competing for something. Whatever it was, we needed to have a partner for the competition. So, standing to my left, who was my partner? None other than Ms. Martha Stewart. Yeah, weird right? As we were standing in the line, however, Martha would NOT SHUT UP. She just kept rambling and rambling as if she was nervous and trying to relax, but no one thought she was amusing. Eventually I looked at her and said, "Martha, will you please shut up???" But it was to no avail. She just kept talking. Finally we had moved up in line to where we were almost about to go into the building. And Martha, says to me, "Oh I'll be right back. I have to go get something out of my car." I was getting annoyed and told her that it was almost our turn, but she just kept walking and saying "I know, it's ok. I'll just be right back. Don't you worry one bit." I then watched as she got in her car, started it, and drove off. Martha abandoned me!! And this is after I wore my Free Martha shirt for so long when she was *ahem* "away" :( oh well, Annie Lennox says, "Sweet dreams are made of these." (Did anyone watch The Apprentice: Martha?? There should be at least 5 people who get that reference).
2) I was in the movie Dreamgirls as....one of the Dream girls??? But I was still a guy, so I guess that makes me the odd one out. Regardless... we were going about our day and on some sort of adventure (haha!) but me and the other girls did NOT like Beyoncé. So we would talk about her behind her back, and then she would come over with her abnormaly large smile and we would start fawning all over her so she wouldn't know we didn't like her... O_o
3) Lastly, this one was just last night.. I was hanging out somewhere - at a restaurant or coffee shop or someplace similar and in walks Karl Lagerfeld with an entourage. The dream could've ended there and it would still be entertaining, but there's more! He walks up to me and a few other people around me and says to each of us, "You. You. You. You. and You." We then get ushered away by his entourage and are taken to a studio where we are informed that Karl needs models for a photoshoot for his new line and he didn't want anyone that had modeled before, therefore he handpicked us to be in his campaign. I don't remember much past that, but I do remember that he was very particular about the shoot and we had to pose and look exactly as he told us to do (he would demonstrate for us how he wanted us to look).
What do these dreams mean...?????? Tell me in the comments section, or share your own wacky celebrity dreams!
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
School (read: aaaaaaaaah!!!)
I can't believe I'm now in my 11th week of the semester... wait, it IS the 11th week right?
School has been crazy to put it lightly. But I'm pushing through while working 39-40 hours a week as well... If you have any free vacations you'd like to send yours truly on, then send them on over!
My group in my film prod. class is driving me crazy. I can't wait until I'm in more of the upper level classes.. it just seems like right now everyone is taking things way too laid back. My group is so much further behind on our semester projects than the rest of the class. One of my group memembers falls asleep in class EVERY SINGLE TIME. Repeatedly. Another one is there like every other class period. Seriously, folks? no...really.... seriously? *rolls eyes out of head*
Anyway.. that's that.
Troubles. Over & Out.
School has been crazy to put it lightly. But I'm pushing through while working 39-40 hours a week as well... If you have any free vacations you'd like to send yours truly on, then send them on over!
My group in my film prod. class is driving me crazy. I can't wait until I'm in more of the upper level classes.. it just seems like right now everyone is taking things way too laid back. My group is so much further behind on our semester projects than the rest of the class. One of my group memembers falls asleep in class EVERY SINGLE TIME. Repeatedly. Another one is there like every other class period. Seriously, folks? no...really.... seriously? *rolls eyes out of head*
Anyway.. that's that.
Troubles. Over & Out.
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